Month: September 2023

Something about me—that I don’t often like to admit—is that I am a die-hard Olivia Rodrigo fan. If you don’t believe me, here’s a screenshot of my Spotify Wrapped from 2022. 

 

Needless to say, I was eager to listen to her sophomore album GUTS that came out on September 8th. If you’re unfamiliar with Olivia Rodrigo, I’d describe her songwriting as emotional and slightly naive, but in a way that perfectly captures the absurdity of being a teenager. I always feel a tinge of nostalgia when listening to her music, despite the fact that I’m probably in my prime teenage years? It’s a bizarre mix that somehow manifests itself in record-breaking songs that almost anyone can enjoy, and the 12 songs on GUTS are certainly no exception. 

Weirdly enough, I realized as I was listening to her new album that my favorite songs were not the ones that brought out her beautiful vocals—instead, they were the angsty and pop-rock leaning ones. Although I loved the ballads on her first album SOUR, there was something slightly off about most of the ballads on GUTS, whether it was the beat, chorus, or lyrics. 

But that doesn’t mean I hated this album. So, without further ado, here are my top 5 tracks on GUTS:

1. “get him back!”

Right now, this might be my favorite track on GUTS, likely due to the fact that I find the lyrics hilariously witty. “And when hе said something wrong, he’d just fly me to Francе,” feels like the perfect way to describe men who truly have no idea what they’re doing, and this line makes me giggle a little each time I hear it. Additionally, I think I flipped a little the first time I realized that the line “I wanna get him back” has a dual meaning…one being that she wants revenge, and the other being that she still wants to be with this guy. Honestly, as someone who constantly has strong feelings toward people, this is pretty much how I feel 24/7. 

2. “bad idea right?”

This was the second song that Rodrigo released as a single, back in August. Even though I know a lot of people are probably sick of it being overplayed by now, “bad idea right?” is still one of my favorites. I love how the verses feel more spoken than sung (mostly because that means I can “sing” it!), and there’s something about the beat that really speaks to me. To me, this song feels like if I met up with a friend that I hadn’t talked to in a few months and tried to explain to them my whole life story. 

3. “ballad of a homeschooled girl”

Okay, maybe I just think that all of Olivia Rodrigo’s lyrics are funny, because some of the ones in “ballad of a homeschooled girl” genuinely made me gasp when I first heard them. “Every guy I like is gay,” and “Thought your mom was your wife” remind me of the random thoughts that I have every once in a while but never share with anyone. I think these lyrics also make Rodrigo feel more human, and a lot of the awkward situations that she describes are things that I can relate to. 

4. “all-american b*tch”

When I first listened to “all-american b*tch,” I actually didn’t like it. The minute GUTS came out and I connected it to my big speaker to hear this as the first track, I actually got scared that I wouldn’t like the album. However, it’s really grown on me. I think what initially shocked me was the fact that she switches the vibe so quickly, from soft and sweet in the verses to angry and violent in the chorus. Maybe I just wasn’t expecting it? But now, this is definitely one of my favorites, from the melody to the lyrics to the way I can feel the teenage angst emanating through the speakers. Also, I really like the way she says “coca-cola bottles” (but how on earth do you use them to curl your hair??).  

5. “pretty isn’t pretty”

Last but not least, “pretty isn’t pretty.” I think out of all of my top 5 songs, this is the closest we’re going to get to a not-so-angsty ballad. To me, “pretty isn’t pretty” feels like an adventure through a high school from a rom-com and perfectly sums up the misery of being a teenage girl. I can totally see bits and pieces of this being the theme song for a sit-com. The beat of the song is also incredibly catchy and the lyrics almost feel optimistic, despite the relatively heavy subject matter. This song feels like the perfect balance between being slower-paced but not sad and still captivating. 

 

Overall, I don’t think any of the songs on GUTS are necessarily bad, but there are definitely some that I will be listening to more than others—and I think it’s definitely worth listening to this album, in full, at least once in your life. 

What exactly is reading?

I feel like reading can be defined in so many ways, and yet it can’t be defined at all. I mean, if you Google “definition of reading,” Oxford Languages literally can’t define it without using the word in the definition.

But if we’re talking about processing words on paper, my first reading memory would probably be from kindergarten.

I wasn’t actually reading English; I was in my first Chinese class, which took place every Saturday at Kennedy Junior High School. My teacher was Teacher Zhang, who had stick-straight black hair that was cut into a bob with straight bangs. I sat in the hard metal chairs that were connected to the desk; my pink rolling backpack was on my right, while everyone else’s bags were stored underneath their chairs or sprawled around the aisles. I remember being handed three books: a blue one with lessons, a green one with homework A, and an orange one with homework B.

We flipped open to the first lesson. There, we learned the very basics of Chinese words. I don’t quite remember exactly what we learned, but I assume it was something along the lines of “here’s how you write the number one!” and “this word means ‘sky’ and you write it this way!” Although my parents had already taught me some basic words, I was still shocked by the fact that these were words that I could read.

I assume there was English involved while I was learning these basic Chinese words, but I don’t remember any of that. Instead, I remember feeling excited to learn something new. I heard the language at home, but wanted to read it. I remember treating it as a fun activity rather than a chore. Understanding Chinese brought me closer to my family and allowed me to understand my heritage better at a young age, and although I didn’t necessarily process all of that information at the time, I definitely remember thinking that I was meant to understand those new words.

What I find particularly interesting about this specific memory is that I don’t think I ever connected Chinese to English. I don’t even think I realized that they were both languages; instead, it was like learning math and history at the same time. I think it was because of this that I didn’t process reading Chinese as “reading,” and rather it was just a new fun activity that I spent every Saturday afternoon doing.

When I think about it now, I’m comforted by the idea that I once enjoyed reading Chinese this much. I enjoy thinking about how it was once an escape, disconnected from the rest of my world. After this initial class, I continued with Chinese classes until freshman year, where I would dedicate two hours a week to reading, completely separated from my daily life in America. Even after I realized that reading Chinese was kind of tedious and mentally draining—and that it was, in fact, a language—I continued with the lessons because it was what connected me to my relatives and my culture, and because it has helped me build hundreds of additional reading memories.

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