I’ve never been able to tell if I’m more of an optimistic or pessimistic person. How can anyone tell about themselves? Shouldn’t they be their own baseline? If someone claims to be a pessimist, that means they know they’re being overly negative when they think the worst will always happen, so wouldn’t the acknowledgment prove that they know these worse-case scenarios aren’t realistic? Even if this realization of their identity comes after assuming something bad will happen and finding out it didn’t, that means they were being pessimistic at that moment but now know what they believed to occur was just an unrealistic outcome. Same with saying you’re an optimist; it kind of feels contradictory. Writing this only confuses me more, so I can’t imagine how this would read to someone who isn’t inside my head. For that, I apologize.
I’ve been told by multiple people that I’m an optimist, being overly confident that positive things will occur in my life. In reality, I don’t actually believe a lot of the things I say. I say many things just to say them, and it’s so fun. A lot of the time, I’m not just lying to others; I’m lying to myself. Yesterday when talking to my friends about the UC application due at 11:59 PM PST that day, I told them I “just knew” the deadline was going to be pushed back by a day like it has in the past. Stating this out loud only solidified my false belief. I didn’t “just know” anything. I rarely “know” anything to begin with. This belief definitely impacted me negatively, resulting in me submitting the application at the very last minute, but it’s often more helpful than one may think. Before a college interview, I told myself that I had already got in and that doing this was just a formality. I believed in this false statement so much that I went in much more confident in my abilities, allowing me to speak much more conversationally and not focus on the possibility of not getting in.
Like most people, how I view the world is highly tainted by the content I interact with on social media. I have viewed many posts of people telling their audience that they become more likely to achieve their goals by convincing themselves that they’ve already been completed. My favorite account on Instagram that seems to adhere to this viewpoint is @afffirmations. Their posts include text like “I will not google symptoms today,” “feelings are mentionable and manageable,” and “I am not stuck in a 2017 pop song,” with bright images that don’t seem to correlate to the text. I find all of their posts strangely helpful by the way they turn unpleasant events into optimistic and funny sayings. This account has greatly inspired me to make extremely specific or relevant images of my own, being the ones spread out throughout this post. Instead of directly handling my emotions, I like to just deny them, hoping if I do, I’ll eventually stop feeling them. Luckily, making these edits help greatly! Allowing myself to type up my wishes or deny any inconvenience I am facing at the moment and placing this text over a poorly edited image always seems to give me more hope for the future. I can’t fully explain these, but I know they make complete sense to me.
Ever since I was little, I have been profoundly concentrating on the phrase “it’s not about the destination but the journey” because it is literally so real. I believe there’s little harm in allowing yourself to enjoy the process without having a known, solidified outcome since life is all about enjoying the little journeys, not how much you accomplish. Allow yourself to believe you did well on your test before you get your grade back. Allow yourself to not prepare for a stressful presentation if you feel like you need rest. Allow yourself to enjoy the journey without rushing towards the destination.
Hi Ria! For starters, when I saw your blog, I had to show my girlfriend the title and the first image. We were cracking up. Then! To my shock and surprise! There were more photos! Before even reading your post, we were cackling at the images you chose for your post (let me rephrase – I was cackling, while Eva was politely laughing). It very much brightened up my day. Yay to positive affirmations. As for your post, I know exactly what instagram account you’re talking about, and while I do not believe I follow that exact one, I think I follow a capybara spinoff, where all of the photos are just really high resolution shots of capybaras with random (positive) text over them. Brightens my day, every single time. Also, I love the language you use in your blog. It feels like I’m being spoken to, rather than being told a super sophisticated story. “It’s not about the destination, it’s about the journey” IS literally so true. You are correct, and I agree. Thank you so much for the affirmations, the motivation to kick finals and look forward to holiday break, and for generally being very swag. Thank you so much Ria!
Hi Ria! I knew that this was your blog post before even looking at your name. You have a distinctively chaotic and funny style in the images you embed within your blog, and they always draw me in.
I loved reading about your perception of the world. I thought that your take on optimism and pessimiscm was really interesting. I agree that there’s a self awareness that comes with labeling oneself as a “pessimist” or “optimist,” and despite understanding that one’s perception of a future situation may be unrealistic, they still hold these beliefs. It makes me want to practice coming to terms with unrealistic guesses about the future and understanding irrational thoughts. It might spare me some excess stress and worry.
I think that, despite some of the ridiculousness that comes with affirmation accounts, trying to focus on what can go right might have some benefit for your future outcomes. I think that the idea of a “self-fulfilling prophecy” holds some truth, and when you focus on what can go right, you might be more inclined to notice the good parts. I really like the idea of enjoying your journey before getting to the destination, and making light of the anxiety-inducing unknowns of the future.
Ria, truthfully, the first paragraph of your blog had already begun to stress me out, but I soon realized you were speaking about affirmations. I was intrigued by your post from the images included, and how I’ve often seen similar ones in my feed.
I often speak in a similar sense, telling people “to not worry,” and that things will go just fine (while fully believing the opposite). I think it’s great that at times it gives you more confidence, and results in better performance. In my case, I simply ignore the issue and hope for the best.
I feel that we’ve always had a similar sense of humor because I thoroughly enjoy these posts and the account @affirmations. I almost find comfort in the disorderly manner of the account and knowing that others feel just as frenzied as myself. It has almost become a way to cope with stressful situations, and while it might not always be beneficial, one can definitely get a slight smile from it.
Honestly, this is a year that I’ve decided to stop stressing about all the little things. Although stress can be beneficial at times, I’ve let loose the reins, and it feels a little bit better on myself. As you said, I’m just enjoying the journey, and hoping things work out.
Ria, I feel like your take on life is refreshing and filled with honesty the rest of the world needs. If I’m being honest, I did have a hard time following your first paragraph about optimism and pessimism (but I think you explain it perfectly as being hard to understand to someone who is not in your head). I didn’t know you created those images with the text laying on top of them! I just assumed you found them on the Internet, but it is so cool to see the creativity and humor that you are able to create with technology. I agree with your use and beliefs in affirmations. I honestly wished I utilized them more. I feel like manifesting works if you truly believe in it, so putting positive thoughts into the universe just makes sense. I think your closing idea of the importance of a journey over the destination is extremely underrated and overlooked especially in high school. I think students (myself included) get so caught up in meeting deadlines, getting good grades, participating in clubs, sports, etc. that it can begin to take away from their well-being. High achieving, exhausted students are unable to be high functioning for a prolonged period of time. Burn out exists. There are times where I believe sleep is more important than school related things. Being disciplined and working hard towards one’s goals is extremely important, but I also think one’s health should also remain a top priority. While every little thing may feel like the greatest catastrophe in the world now, I find comfort in knowing (and hoping) it won’t matter 10, 20, 30 years from now.